A couple days of ago, I posted this note on Instagram:


It was geared toward my Perfectionist friends, because I know what it’s like to feel the internal pressure of trying to beat yourself. I take extreme pride in my work, especially what I promote via MOXIE Nashville because this is my business. However, if I’m not careful, I’ll try to do it all, forgetting that I’m not supposed to.

Rewind – did you catch that?

I always laugh when people say things such as, “Vannesia, you look like you have it together.” I will be the FIRST person to tell you, “Thanks so much! I work hard, but don’t believe the hype.”

Let me unveil the truth about every single person you think is out here killing the game…they have help. There’s a team, a tribe, a squad, or even a group text that is hyping that person up or sending unknown prayers up on their behalf. Batman had Robin, Michael Jordan had Scottie Pippen, and even Shaggy had Scooby!  No one makes it by themselves, and the sooner you can accurately assess your weaknesses, as well as your strengths, the quicker you’ll be able to ask for help.

I’ll give you an example that occurred less than 24 hours ago.

I have been on the fast track since graduation and slowly started to neglect my house. I had a long list of things to do, but never seemed to really finish anything because I can’t be creative in cluttered places. Every time I returned home, there was a looming problem waiting for me, casting a dark shadow on my doorway…(insert dramatic music): my laundry.

Now, I absolutely despise doing laundry. I’m the type of person who will wash the clothes, dry the clothes, and just pull from my basket of clean garments for a week before I ever fold a thing. However, my Mother LOVES to do laundry – she has an entire system set up. I’m serious! The lady has turned it into a work of art – she can even fold the fitted sheets so that they look just like the other blankets! Similar to me taking pride in my work, she takes pride in her washer and dryer. Even in high school, we established an agreement: I did her hair (so she no longer went to the beauty shop) and she did my laundry. It was just how we rolled.

When life gets busy, laundry is the first priority to go. So, when I called my Mom on Mother’s Day and told her I washed almost everything but haven’t folded anything, she offered me the opportunity to bring my laundry over. Now – here’s where the lesson comes in: I took the opportunity.

Because of our “previous client relationship,” I was confident that her strength in this area would greatly combat my weakness and yield a positive return on my investment. It took me about 30 minutes to lug a full hamper and 2 over flowing baskets of clean clothes down 3 flights of stairs and into my car. About an hour later I showed up at her doorstep like this:

(Don’t judge…just keep reading!)

I mean…what better way to spend Mother’s Day than with a pile of clothes? Don’t worry, she conveniently needed her hair done when I arrived at her house.

We ended up spending the entire day together, quality time I would have cut short if I was simply trying to get everything done myself.  All I had to do was mention that I needed help to someone who was more experienced in a particular area than I was, and be humble enough to take them up on their offer. Not only did I get my laundry knocked out, I found time to complete many other things on my to-do list without being completely overwhelmed. She got her hair done and I even get some great blog content!

 I encourage you to gauge your weaknesses and ask yourself:

  • What is a hindrance to me right now?
  • Whose strength can I pair this issue with?
  • What responsibilities can I outsource?
  • Can I delegate this chore to a subordinate who is strong in this area and empower them to do it?
  • Can I take this task to a professional who specializes in this?
  • Am I the only person that can complete this job?
  • Do I need to go hangout with my friends/family to re-energize me?

You may have to shell out a couple coins for a professional service, but if it helps your peace of mind, consider it an investment in yourself! Just because you CAN do something doesn’t mean you SHOULD and just because you ask for help THIS time doesn’t mean you’ll need help ALL the time. Knowing when to call for backup can help you maximize your time, money, energy, and sanity.

Remember, the hustle is only for a season. Work smarter, not harder.



Hi, I'm Vannesia. I quit my job in 2016 because I knew I was purposed for more than tweeting. Now, I get to encourage creatives and entrepreneurs while helping them use what they have to level up in their life and business. Be careful, signing up to receive my messages may cause you to start believing in yourself. Only click the button if you're about that life.

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